in order not to hear people say I'm "emo" or "ahlian", I think this picture's a good start. lol. I aint at all anyway. =\\\\
but I seriously prefer this edited picture of mine. heh. okay, emo.
a few of us went off early 4 yesterday D&T remediation. cos madamsim wasnt there. and there's no one who bothers about us, who guide us along. we were all bored. so went off early. I was drained. but guanyi asked me 2 IMM 2 make his specs. he's extremely indecisive, huhh, worse than me lorrrr. he cant decide which specs 2 get. but I think the 1 he bought should be okay. not those type that I will wear, but he looks fine with it. black + white, simple.
he forced me 2 shop around with him! and had mac. which I was really really not hungry but sleepy. after that we went Popular, a kinda long stay there. lol. cos that's where I'll shop! =xxx then we went 2 a corner and started talking pictures. that corner's quiet, and super scary! there's sound from a wooden block! we both heard it. but since we got each other's company, we just hack care and continue taking pictures. lol. took a lot luhh! he's head is super big, so he complained, saying that I should be standing 4ward. very dumb right. my head's.. not small luhh! ur head big! lol. he's trying 2 do what I do. like funny faces etc etc, and he cant. and he claimed that he's ugly. I was trying 2 teach him how 2 look "presentable". lol. 1 word, NATURAL. U wanna stick out ur tongue, then do it like how U should! heh.
reached home around 7 plus or so. I'm drop dead. did D&T, and I really "draw and paint you a picture". lol. slept around 3 plus. remediations 2day was alright. science rememdiations seems extremely fast, unlike Tuesday's social studies. 2 days of remediations, accusing again and again! somehow pissed me off. I did talked, but not as loud and as much as others lehhhh. but I admit I cough louder and much more than others luhh. arghhh. I was copying notes, and teachers cant stop calling my name! "XXIIIAAAOOOJJUUUNN!", "XXIIAAOOJJUUNNN, DO U GET WHAT I MEAN? UNDERSTAND? DUN DRAW.", "I CAN ONLY HEAR XIIIAAOOJJUUNNN'S VOICE.", "A LOT OF NOISE THERE.", "I DIDNT ACCUSE U LORR.", arghh, super annoying. 1stly, pls open ur ears and eyes big big! 2ndly, I didnt say any1 accuse me mahh, only talked back 2 msyeo. =xxx 3rdly, I WAS DOING MY WORK!! =(((( arghh, whatever! okay fine, anything if U prefer.
I'm super beat-out now, and I wanna sleep. ooo, pls clap? I did my physics 2day! wah hahaha. b4 mrlim starts complaining and nagging again. his "enjoyment is passion" tee is soooo attracting my attention! lol. I dunno why.
meeting some of my classmates 2moro, 4 short while, I hope. ms elaineyeo's leaving! =((( so we decided 2 plan something 4 her. heh. LOVE HER. =))) and I believe 5n1 do.
okay, I shall sleep soon. D&T and Chemistry 2moro! I think I'm science FREAK! cos mrlim somehow motivated me. lol. but he's extremely sensative. really. ooo. we knew his horoscope! lol.
I'm kinda down 2day. *cough cough. and feeling sick. gloomy. arghhhhhhhh. I hope the sleep will help then. sigh.
more edition of pictures, check out my friendster. =))
`It's not right, not okay, say the words that you say, maybe we'll better off this way.
I'm not fine, I'm in pain, it's harder every day. maybe we'll better off this way.
bullshit! I love no one alright, annoying freak. stop putting words into my mouth.
1:23:00 AM
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
where are you? you used to make me smile, brighten up my day. now you're the one who hurt me the most. fuck.
I read the whole book, about my life, experiences 4 last yr. I wrote it down, time, day. it's as if I'm writing and publishing a book of my own. I wish I could someday. heh. I dun have that ability anyway. those days when I'm a Major, how I overcome. or maybe, I didnt? even when I read through, I felt the pressure. the disappointment, those flops. I aint a very gd Major, maybe not even successful. I dunno. I guess not. woo. but how times files. the day when I agreed 2 be 1, the day I promised, the day I got praise, the day I so much wanna hug the whole Band, the day I wanna say "thank you", the day my section pissed me off, the day people dun trust me, the day I'm standing alone, the day.. the day.. orhh well, having so much 2 say, that's the past.
the images appeared in my mind. the day I saw some1 somewhere surprisely. haha. n now, I hardly see that some1 whom I bump in2 almost everyday. lol. what a joke, what a life. I'm missing every bit of it.
thank you, every1. 4 believeing in me. I aint the best,but I did my best.
same goes 2 my O level.
I'm thankful and glad that I got 1 subject done. I hope I'll get the result I always want 2 have anyway. but really, that's my best. I'm that thankful cos I'm having a really horrible feeling this morning. my head's heavy, dun tell me it's bcos of my hair. =\\ just so heavy, I'm feeling giddy. so weak, like fainting any point of time. really. hate it. like the whole sky's falling. orhh no, sky wont fall.
that's why I'm glad everything's over. though I felt soo blank a few times, but I really trying hard 2 concentrate and finish everything. yes, everything. thank god.
a few things b4 I end?;
-get well soon.
-take care, stupid thong.
-markcus should be fine by now. luckily everything's back 2 normal 4 him.
-happiness, zhiyuan.
-things will be fine, guanyi.
-happy birthday, kaimeng.
-lousy! all copycats r useless, not innovative at all! esp U!
-and shit you. you made me so dumb, making wrong decision. dun say I didnt cherish, it's you didnt care a shit thing about me. soon, I'll delete everything.
I didnt had much 2day, I dunno why I got stomachache. arghh. I loathe my nose, my stomach. they never stop giving me problems. now comes throat giving me problem.
:)I'll drawand paintyou a picture.
1:09:00 AM
Sunday, May 27, 2007
I need to talk with you again, why did you go away, All our time together, just feels like yesterday, I never thought I'd see, a single day without you, You see the things we take for granted we can sometimes lose. And if I promise not to feel this pain, Will I see you again, will I see you again.
Time will pass me by, may be I'll never learn to smile, But I know I will make it through, if you wait for me. And all the tears I cry, no matter how I try. They will never bring you home to me, so won't you wait for me in heaven.
Do you remember how it was, when we never seemed to care. Days went by so quickly, cos I thought you'd always be there. It's hard to let you go, though I know that I must try. I feel like I've been cheated, cos we never said goodbye.
And if I promise not to feel this pain, Will I see you again.
And I miss you so, and I need to know, Will you wait for me
2:07:00 AM
Saturday, May 26, 2007
Dear Angel of mine,
thought you say everything should be vice versa? but this time round, you didn't. or not the 1st time? Angel, tell me now, tell me why. tell me what, tell me when. cos I'm super devastated. Dear Angel, Angel..
I love these 2 little Star. Kiki and Lala. say hi 2 them, people. haiya, I super no mood 2 update. but really really wanna say how I feel. wasnt feeling very gd after that say of parents' meeting. but I tell no 1. everything was okay. mum's pressurizing me. but yet, somehow she's not? I dunno. "study more harder." said mum. "it's study harder!!" I corrected. but she insisted on hers rather than mine, cos she said "harder" is not enough. orhh well, regarding how she pressurize me, I wont say luhh. hmm, mrsliang touched me, by 1 simple sentence, "myself and ur teachers think that U can do well. why is it this way? U got no problems. I've seen ur files, very gd. and got no complaints from teachers. ur teachers and I believe n trust that U can do very well, if U study SMART. really. okay?" haiii. am I such a disappointing dude? and fuck! when mrho asked me how's my POA going 2day, I dunno how 2 ans back. seriously. I dun want him 2 look down on me, but I didnt do very well either. shit it. and once again, he said "HI, XIAOJUN" 2 me n give that kinda SMILE. ewwwwwwww.
c'mon, O LEVEL CHINESE. it's on monday, and I'm so going 2 do my super best, superxiaojun. dun b anxious, dun b. b strong, BE STRONG!
I think I'm dense. I shouldnt doubt any1. even though I sat down in the living room and everything just appeared in my mind. 1 sms, and wake me up. and that sms, made me doubt. but nonono, hell no I'm going 2 doubt about anything, any1, anymore. never mind, treat it as I'm hell talking shit. thanks OINKoink anyway. appreciate that.
I'm having a bloody cough, and also, say hi 2 nose bleeding. =\\\\ but it's so not going 2 bring me down. boooooooo. everytime, everything's soooo beautiful in acoustic.
` you make me can't stop listening to the song. it meant a lot. a lot. I never 4get things I said to you, I wonder have you? never mind. you'll always be the one. [not the song above anyway. but 1 of my favourite song when in need of someone.]
1:15:00 AM
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
my favourite piece of the day! that's why I'm showing off 2day. lol. the reason why I'm updating. super dense, but cannot MEHH. =\\\
took a few picture 2day, after a long period of time. really long okay! the one on the left also took it 2day. freshly production. =xx heh. I hope that's why passport photo mann! cos my passport's gonna expired. then I need 2 have a really PROPER picture. isnt that proper enough? the person asked me comb up my fringe, must c the ears etc. super irritating! my hair'sNEAT! and so I decided 2 comb my properly next time. LOL.
inspiration source from TAN YUAN CHAO, my class MONITRESS. hahaha. orhh well, I dunno if I should say why is it so. cos I bet if he reads my blog, I'll be dead. but bet he dun? lol. okay never mind, Markcus will know, HORRRR. D&T, drawing, OCTOPUS! lol. guess guess. =DDDDDD
and I love my SUPER BIG eyes. wah hahahahah. *super proud. with my mole. =XXXX
this aint something very NEW or humourous I guess? lol. but I love it this wayy. =))))
maybe it's pictures of a broken heart, EMO`tions.
I always wish 2 be happy. and I hope you do.
okay, I'm done. I'm drained. I sprained my neck, and I dunno what I had 2 have such laxative effect. probably that fruit juice and 3/4 milk. arghhhh.
`would you be the one who stand by me? would you lend me a shoulder to cry? maybe you used to be, it was only used to be.
12:33:00 AM
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
I'm blogging bcos.. 1. BenOKC introduced me something, real nice. and I love it. so I wanna share. it's amazing how it melts me, and I believe it'll melts U 2? and it's amazingly sweeeet. =))
I dont think U can find this anymore. wooo.
2. still remember me talking about the personality test ms elaine yeo gave my class? really fun though. and I check out more about my own personality, Peaceful Phlegmatic.
Peaceful Phlegmatic Personality The Introvert * The Watcher * The Pessimist
Peaceful Phlegmatic's Emotions Low-key personality Easygoing and relaxed Calm, Cool, and collected Patient, well balanced Consistent life Quiet but witty Sympathetic and kind Keeps emotions hidden Happily reconciled to life All-purpose person
Peaceful Phlegmatic As A Parent Makes a good parent Takes time for the children Is not in a hurry Can take the good with the bad Doesn't get easily upset
Peaceful Phlegmatic At Work Competent and steady Peaceful and agreeable Has administrative ability Mediates problems Avoids conflicts Good under presssure Find the easy way
Peaceful Phlegmatic As A Friend Good listener Easy to get along with Pleasant and enjoyable Inoffensive Dry sense of humor Enjoys watching people Has many friends Has compassion and concern Has little need for friends Will work for group activity Will lead and organize Is usually right Excels in emergencies Exerts sound leadership Establishes goals Motivates family to action Knows the right answer Organizes household
I dunno how true it can be. but msyeo told us is kinda true. and it's kinda fun, as in 2 know myself more? of cos, U have 2 do a personality test 2 determine ur personality. know more about urself, why not?
okay, I'm super sleepy after reading up those proverbs. =\\\ sleep, people, sleep. I'm frazzled. and I'm gonna have that SUPER intensive mt again! boooooooo.
`and when will I see ur smile again?
1:13:00 AM
Monday, May 21, 2007
guess I didnt mention much about my Friday. I rushed home after intensive mt. it was a humid day. and every1 took that so easily. every1 just cant b fagged about it, I guess. well, cos they know it was just a prac luhh. but I just did luhh. we're supposed to anyway.
met Derrick, YeeWai and Yanjing 2 Kinokuniya. cos we're super interested in msyeo's personality book. heh. we all found it. but no 1 buys. lol! I bought a story book instead. okay. that's soo me. never mind. I'll soon buy something else again! lalala. but Kinokuniya's super big! making me super giddy and feel so much like fainting! cos all adults "chiong" 2 buy books on Friday. LOL. met Vic and Mark. lol. that TWO idiots. =XXX btw, so sorry Vic, I was super late and he's leaving. bleahh. anyway, I understand Mark, no worries. what's wrong with NACHOS, VIC?!
Band resumed. so stop asking me. cos I'm a super old member already. =\\ I saw kids running around and outside the band room. and I saw mrchew. didnt talk much, cos I'm rushing 4 intensive mt. that's super intensive anyway. we're going 2 do that everyday till the real chinese O level paper. woot. 8 more days. I'm super anxious already. but I really wanna do well and clear it so I can have more time 4 other sub. it's super dense 2 retake it again luhh. must well do it well once. I'll miss madamtan then. orhh well..
I'm doing D&T these 2 days. I think I shouldnt neglect my chi. !%$&**(& I hope I dun luhh.
I found Red Jumpsuit Apparatus' album! lolol. super happy. went IMM with Mark 2day. and I miss Starbucks! =((
WHO's THE PRIVATE NUMBER WHO CALLED YESTERDAY?! haiya, just sms me luhh. those use private number 1 horr, making my nerves fray! =\\\ and make me curious. blahh blahh.
btw, I'm fine people. I will be.
REPLY MY SMS! cos I'm kind of worried. =(((
didnt buy S.H.E's album. I'm their fans no more. =)) still love sun yanzi ONLY. lol. but these 2 r my favourite. try listening.
`I miss you, superperson.
12:04:00 AM
Saturday, May 19, 2007
PINK form. that's how bad my result is. my chinese's super horrible luhh.
I'm supposed 2 work hard. yeahh? I'm gonna work super hard now. and so I chiong my D&T that night and slept at 1 plus. madamsim's great. she helped me a lot that day. cos I asked her 2 stay. hee. love her! but she wasnt in sch on friday. =\\ mrssng asked me 2 continue working hard. cos I was out of point 4 my SBQ. as well as my english paper1. I was out of point, again. super lousy, I know. but well, I hope I'll do well toooo. I'm pressurize by my peers etc. so now I got Pink form, laugh mann, laugh, arrogant bastards out there. they r, I know. I passed my oral anyway. but wasnt the score I want 2 have. thought it could b better. and it should be better anyway.
"though I dont want a Band Sports Leader all along." the last sentence I got b4 I pass out being a Sports Leader 4 4 years. woot.
I aint strong like what U guys always think, people. thanks 4 thinking highly of me. btw, I hate the tactless U.
`a Thank You from you is surprising but you haven't tell me why. "Everything." you said. but I didnt give you much. but well.. maybe that's better for us. I dunno. and I'll let nature take its course. maybe I should thank you as well, for the memories.
4:38:00 PM
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
I'm super fucked up. everyone's soooo good in their oral yet I got soo fucking nervous and guess everything's gone. I think I'm going 2 get soo bloody lousy score 4 prelims, 4 mid-year AND for O level. whatever luhh. no need anyone 1 bother about me.I dun need any1 2 pity me k.THANK YOU and go away. shit it.
I'm feeling SUPER down. and I have 2 go sch 4 the Sports Leaders BBQ soon. I dun want 2, actually. but well, just go luhh. "in life, we're just doing a lot of things that we dun want and dun wish 2. that's life." orhh, well said. I'm ALWAYS doing things I hate and with those people I cant click with AT ALL. people dun understand me and I just dun wanna understand them. that's all. cos I tired 2, they just live their own life. HAIYA! whatever lahh.
I HATE XIAOJUN LUHH!and she hates everyone as well. I'm annoyed, suckers.
4:15:00 PM
Monday, May 14, 2007
It´s over and done, but the heartache lives on inside
and who is the one you´re clinging to,
instead of me tonight.
And where are you now, now that I need you, tears on my pillow, where ever you go, I´ll cry me a river
that´s leads to your ocean
you´ll never see me fall apart
In the words of a broken heart
it´s just emotions, taking me over,
caught up in a sorrow, lost in the song,
but if you don´t come back,
come home to me darling,
don´t you know there´s nobody
left in this world to hold me tight,
there´s nobody left in this world to kiss goodnight,
goodnight
I´m there, at your side, a part of all the things you are, but you have a part of someone else, you gotta go find your shinning star.
Goodnight
went out with Markcus and Victor, my new friend on friday after Science paper1 and D&T paper. =))
alright. I'd failed my Chem and Phy according 2 MsSeah Kiat Yee. 7 passes in my class 4 Chem. I bet that I'm 1 of them. HAHA. and that cost her "YI BA HOU" on her weekends. =xxxx I still cant stop laughing about this. even during D&T paper. stupid Markcus luhh! LOL. and that BREAD FACE, horr. LOL. [orhh well. I realised a very funny Bread Face picture beside the bus stop. the 1 after dunearn sec's bus stop. ehh, the bus188 that can go lot1. lol.] GO SEE! lol.
okay! meet up with the guys. and Victor was late! bad impression lehh! I nearly fall asleep, VIC! and I bet Markcus too. LOL. I was being very unfriendly luhh. cos very not close with him. so I was chatting with Markcus all along. craps as usual. luckily Victor took a bit of initiative. and so we started chatting at times. haha. he's LAME. yes. and he loves PEPPER LUNCH! orhh gosh. I cant stand it. lol. he's super pepper lunch. after the long walk in town, we had pepper lunch, BECAUSE OF VICTOR! hahaha. though we dun really town. but well, just go luhh. like where can U go other than that? LOL. so Victor went home around 8 plus as he got his ridiculous tution that starts at 10pm! haha. super ridiculous! lol. then I waited 4 Markcus at JE mac. and had a few sms-es. SOMEONE DIDNT REPLY MY SMS!super annoying!but NEVER MIND. hahaha. and had a small quarrel? I dunno luhh. dun care.
Markcus came and we started being crazy. after chatting a while, we went 2 take neoprints. the 1 on top. LOL. cant see huhh. sorry, no scanner. but we were really having lots of fun luhh! and hope Victor was there with us 2 join the fun! lol. and I cant believe it, I'm 17!! and I'm still taking neoprints. Markcus said "this is becos older people got nothing much they haven done b4. they feel bored. neoprints can kill boredeem." ehh. as well as drinking. LOL! that kills sadness tooooo. I'm super frazzled + super downcast + super emo+ super hurt. and I fall asleep after that few whatever sms-es.
and a few pictures b4 the day ends.
HAPPY MOTHERS'DAY TO ALLMOTHERSSSSS. esp Mine! =))
had steamboat at Bugis with family without my 3rd bro cos he had 2 stay in his camp still. bought cake with my 2nd bro in the afternoon. just had it later 4 my lunch! heh. I haven even try it. lol. we were super full. then eldest bro wanna bring us 2 had dessert. but it's like.. no more seats. how crowded Bugis can be!! night life 4 every1! =)) orhh. was supposed 2 meet wt up on saturday 4 Starbucks. and we didnt cos this last min little celebrations. nothing much luhh. hope my mum's happy.
still pictures. HAHA.
very random, indeed.
SUNDAY! stupid weiting woke up soo early! smsed me about 11 plus in the morning. we met up at 315pm and I was earlier than her! heh. we saw a very messy person! with colorful scarf [he copied me luhh!], piercing on lips [copy me again!], cap, long sleeves, jeans, dirty sneakers and huge messy belt! why cant he b simpler? he's making me headache! lol.
we went Plaza Sinagpura's Starbucks 2 support Suffian! haha. he's long hair is irritating me! lol. cut hair luhh, suffian! lol. why are people sooooo messy! lol. then we had a long chat outdoor. nice breeze. =)) with my Banana JaveChips Frapp with Blended Cream. heh. still prefer Panjang's! I miss my friends there. orhh well. Sue, Faliq, many many more. I WANT THAT SUN YANZI's POSTER, WEITING!!!! really pretty! lol. shopped around Plaza and we both got bored.
sat in the MRT station 4 a few min, dunno where 2 go. then! we headed 2 Changi Airport! hahaha. super ridiculous, I know. lalala. it's like.. so far. and I suddenly had a stomachache. just aching. bleahh. I didnt had warm food 4 the whole day! haha. Changi Airport's greeeeattt!! we had Skytrain! it's like "CHANGI LRT" weiting said. LOL. it's soo classic luhh! then shopped around like a tourist. lol. and.. WE HAD STARBUCKS!!! she missed her cheese braid! and I had potato salad. =))) the cheese braid got story behind 1 k! haha. cosy. but we STILL prefer panjang's. heheheh. walked 2 the same old places we walked during band tour 2006. wooo. recalled a lot of things ehh. sad. happy. well, past. let's keep it inside out hearts, and we know it would b 4ever. =))
after that, she and her crazy idea again, 2 go HollandV. =\\\ I didnt teach her anything bad! I just bring her there, cos she wanted 2. lol. she was amazed by everything there luhh. soo cutee. then bring her walked around. she's choosy! like dunno what 2 have 4 dinner! lol. ended up at NYDC. I had Apple Crumble and she had Roast Chicken Spag. woot. she said it's sooo fulling! lol. she's becoming old luhh! she said she loves HollandV. and I really didnt teach her anything badddd!!! lol.
home around 11 plus. woo. super frazzled again.
I cant b bothered 2 sms you every night already.
miss being a Band Major.
but if you asked, I won't want to be one again. LOL. memories, and that's enough.
EDITED. =))
check out my Friendster tooo. =p
` feelings can come and go. it didnt go. but you're forcing it to. what a joke. I cant b bothered about any single thing about you anymore. you're toooo random, I cant take it. I'm trying 2 maintain, yet you dont seems 2 care anyway. it's tiring. when I'm all alone trying 2 improve everything. so, I think I shall let you go. let's end everything. you and fraud! I dont wanna play around with you anymore. I dont wanna b the fool all the time. again and again.
1:33:00 PM
Sunday, May 13, 2007
afterall, you just don't understand a single thing. am I being unreasonable? am I being ridiculous? I don't think so. why is it all the time you just don't understand me? a sms kills everything. I don't care what you're thinking at that time. I don't care if you'd drank and got drunk. if there's no conclusion, rather than waiting, I guess it's time to let go. everyone's tired. and HURT is the only reason.
-will update more on : day out with Markcus and Victor, my new known 'pepper lunch' friend. =DD Mothers' Day dinner with family. Starbucks with WT in the eveving. pictures, and more pictures!
3:30:00 AM
Thursday, May 10, 2007
I wonder if U ever realised it's very unfair 2 me. every little thing just bring me down. do U realise I'm still alive? I did nothing wrong 2 make U treat me this way. and I swear I didnt ill-treat U anyway. U treat me well? hurr. nobody knows.
went IMM with mum yesterday and took this picture. mum's a model 4 a second, I guess. she complained, cos she said she's wearing a ugly shoes. =\\\
no papers 2day. and yesterday math paper2 making me puke! really. it's sooo warm in the hall, it's soo frustrating 2 have questions left unsolved. I dun have the time. but it's making me ill. but what more can I say? well, I'd tried, realy hard this time.
yesterday night was horrible. supposed 2 meet marcus up but he ended up falling asleep till this morning! and I was awake earlier than him. headache. =\\ but luckily I was home yesterday night. though I was super bored by the television programmes. nose bleed 4 about 45min - and hour. try b4? and it's flowing out of ur nose. blood clot. stopped 4 about 30min and continued. happened 2 U b4? I was nearly ended up in hospital cos the blood just couldnt stop flowing and giving me hell 2 breathe. but I refused 2 go.
wonder if 1 day, I realised I have nose cancer?who will b there?
EDITH's ADDICTION. it's EDITh-TIVE.
` whenever I'm down, you ain't there.
2:00:00 PM
Tuesday, May 08, 2007
it's the way you see things.. life is just a Lack of Color.
alright. I'm just gonna update. had been looonnnggg since I last update. and soon, I wanna SLEEP!! hee. had geog paper 2day. orhh noo. I dunno what's Ecotourist Attractions. well, due 2 I cant find my notes and so.. didnt study this topic at all! so guess what I wrote.. "Ecotourist Attraction is like a activity organise by the country, like Great Singapore Sale." FAINT! Laugh Out Loud, everyone! it's either I kill myself 1st, if not msyeo will chop me in2 half. even I myself find it super stupid. arghhh.
math paper1 was.. not as tough as I thought. but I know I wont score. due 2 careless mistakes and some blanks. I just cant think of the solutions. I know I'll b able 2 do it, if only I practice long long ago. orhh well. so I told myself that I'm so going 2 grab marks 4 paper2 2moro.
last few weeks' papers was.. okay I guess. physics was super tough! mrlim luh! still happily said it's okay! nono. it's not. and every1 jolly well know I suck in phy. I thought I'm going 2 score! 1st time I study till soo confidence. but well, not going 2 score anymore. =\\\ chem was a bit easier than phy. A BIT. mrtan's papers' weird. I asked him questions he dun seems 2 b bothered! arghh. maybe I'm not his student! wahh lau. super rude lehh. "U label and write luh! I'll give U the mark." wahh. as if U mark it. %^!@^^&** super irritated.
I hope POA's fine. I did a bit here and there. didnt complete 1 whole question at all. due 2.. I got blank and everything's gone. =\\\\ I DID STUDY 4 NON-TRADING!!! but I cant remember much. boohoo.
my chinese paper2 was hell. my 1st page of answer sheet is.. BLANK. yes, blank. cos when I was about 1 write, time's up. I was all along looking at the HCL's timing! how dumb. and I did it. it's just that I wanna check ans after everything. and I was trying so hard not 2 think of it. but well, when marcus asked me about it after paper, I burst in2 tears. =(((( super sad luh. like.. how dumb can I be. though madamtancf said it's okay. and everything. I'm just feeling baddd. really. haii.
met up marcus on friday night. after HollandV with mum. treat her that jap grilling food. the meat's real fresh! and I ordered veggies! lol. not ex luh. but well, this is not mothers' day celebration. just got the savings, so why not? =))
so marcus and I were at WestMall. well, can U imagine, I had CoffeeBean! boohoo. I missed Starbucks! didnt go 4 about 2 weeks already. I want my Banana Jave Chips Frapp, GreenTea Frapp, Ice Vanilla Latte and so on. haha. all my fav luh. arghh. I had Black Forest at CoffeeBean. and marcus and I were happily chatting and crapping. went home about 1. I was super drained. cos was accompanying my mum the whole day, didnt took afternoon nap. was like zombie, I can say. lol. but well, friday was a gd day in fact. =))
didnt go out on saturday though I wish 2. I'm just vexed. really wanna get out. sigh.
sms and sms. 4 the whole day, from saturday midnight to sunday evening. =))
ENOUGH.things cant continue like this, people. I know much more things than every1 else. I aint a kid anymore. but bcos of being the youngest, U guys of cos think I dunno anything luh. it's just bcos I cant do anything! I cant b lecturing my bro? though I know how many mistakes he has. it's annoying! and I'm tired.. and stress. I'm not paranoid. this little home's getting worse at time goes by. people here r going crazy. stop yelling! stop screaming! I need my rest, my sleep. I need some Peace. I need the slience 2 study. I need all these 2 stop. sigh. and who really going through the hell I'm going through. shit it.
and a few of my edition. I love the top right picture with this edition. =)))
` and I think of you everytime when I'm down and I feel lonely. where are you?
but I seriously prefer this edited picture of mine. heh. okay, 
a few of us went off early 4 yesterday D&T remediation. cos madamsim wasnt there. and there's no one who bothers about us, who guide us along. we were all bored. so went off early. I was drained. but guanyi asked me 2 IMM 2 make his specs. he's extremely indecisive, huhh, worse than me lorrrr. he cant decide which specs 2 get. but I think the 1 he bought should be okay. not those type that I will wear, but he looks fine with it. 
I read the whole book, about my life, experiences 4 last yr. I wrote it down, time, day. it's as if I'm writing and publishing a book of my own. I wish I could someday. heh. I dun have that ability anyway. those days when I'm a Major, how I overcome. or maybe, I didnt? even when I read through, I felt the pressure. the disappointment, those flops. I aint a very gd Major, maybe not even successful. I dunno. I guess not. woo. but how times files. the day when I agreed 2 be 1, the day I promised, the day I got praise, the day I so much wanna hug the whole Band, the day I wanna say "thank you", the day my section pissed me off, the day people dun trust me, the day I'm standing alone, the day.. the day.. orhh well, having so much 2 say, that's the past.
I love these 2 little Star. Kiki and Lala. say hi 2 them, people.
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it's the way you see things.. life is just a 
