in order not to hear people say I'm "emo" or "ahlian", I think this picture's a good start. lol. I aint at all anyway. =\\\\
but I seriously prefer this edited picture of mine. heh. okay, emo.
a few of us went off early 4 yesterday D&T remediation. cos madamsim wasnt there. and there's no one who bothers about us, who guide us along. we were all bored. so went off early. I was drained. but guanyi asked me 2 IMM 2 make his specs. he's extremely indecisive, huhh, worse than me lorrrr. he cant decide which specs 2 get. but I think the 1 he bought should be okay. not those type that I will wear, but he looks fine with it. black + white, simple.
he forced me 2 shop around with him! and had mac. which I was really really not hungry but sleepy. after that we went Popular, a kinda long stay there. lol. cos that's where I'll shop! =xxx then we went 2 a corner and started talking pictures. that corner's quiet, and super scary! there's sound from a wooden block! we both heard it. but since we got each other's company, we just hack care and continue taking pictures. lol. took a lot luhh! he's head is super big, so he complained, saying that I should be standing 4ward. very dumb right. my head's.. not small luhh! ur head big! lol. he's trying 2 do what I do. like funny faces etc etc, and he cant. and he claimed that he's ugly. I was trying 2 teach him how 2 look "presentable". lol. 1 word, NATURAL. U wanna stick out ur tongue, then do it like how U should! heh.
reached home around 7 plus or so. I'm drop dead. did D&T, and I really "draw and paint you a picture". lol. slept around 3 plus. remediations 2day was alright. science rememdiations seems extremely fast, unlike Tuesday's social studies. 2 days of remediations, accusing again and again! somehow pissed me off. I did talked, but not as loud and as much as others lehhhh. but I admit I cough louder and much more than others luhh. arghhh. I was copying notes, and teachers cant stop calling my name! "XXIIIAAAOOOJJUUUNN!", "XXIIAAOOJJUUNNN, DO U GET WHAT I MEAN? UNDERSTAND? DUN DRAW.", "I CAN ONLY HEAR XIIIAAOOJJUUNNN'S VOICE.", "A LOT OF NOISE THERE.", "I DIDNT ACCUSE U LORR.", arghh, super annoying. 1stly, pls open ur ears and eyes big big! 2ndly, I didnt say any1 accuse me mahh, only talked back 2 msyeo. =xxx 3rdly, I WAS DOING MY WORK!! =(((( arghh, whatever! okay fine, anything if U prefer.
I'm super beat-out now, and I wanna sleep. ooo, pls clap? I did my physics 2day! wah hahaha. b4 mrlim starts complaining and nagging again. his "enjoyment is passion" tee is soooo attracting my attention! lol. I dunno why.
meeting some of my classmates 2moro, 4 short while, I hope. ms elaineyeo's leaving! =((( so we decided 2 plan something 4 her. heh. LOVE HER. =))) and I believe 5n1 do.
okay, I shall sleep soon. D&T and Chemistry 2moro! I think I'm science FREAK! cos mrlim somehow motivated me. lol. but he's extremely sensative. really. ooo. we knew his horoscope! lol.
I'm kinda down 2day. *cough cough. and feeling sick. gloomy. arghhhhhhhh. I hope the sleep will help then. sigh.
more edition of pictures, check out my friendster. =))
`It's not right, not okay, say the words that you say, maybe we'll better off this way.
I'm not fine, I'm in pain, it's harder every day. maybe we'll better off this way.
bullshit! I love no one alright, annoying freak. stop putting words into my mouth.
1:23:00 AM
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
where are you? you used to make me smile, brighten up my day. now you're the one who hurt me the most. fuck.
I read the whole book, about my life, experiences 4 last yr. I wrote it down, time, day. it's as if I'm writing and publishing a book of my own. I wish I could someday. heh. I dun have that ability anyway. those days when I'm a Major, how I overcome. or maybe, I didnt? even when I read through, I felt the pressure. the disappointment, those flops. I aint a very gd Major, maybe not even successful. I dunno. I guess not. woo. but how times files. the day when I agreed 2 be 1, the day I promised, the day I got praise, the day I so much wanna hug the whole Band, the day I wanna say "thank you", the day my section pissed me off, the day people dun trust me, the day I'm standing alone, the day.. the day.. orhh well, having so much 2 say, that's the past.
the images appeared in my mind. the day I saw some1 somewhere surprisely. haha. n now, I hardly see that some1 whom I bump in2 almost everyday. lol. what a joke, what a life. I'm missing every bit of it.
thank you, every1. 4 believeing in me. I aint the best,but I did my best.
same goes 2 my O level.
I'm thankful and glad that I got 1 subject done. I hope I'll get the result I always want 2 have anyway. but really, that's my best. I'm that thankful cos I'm having a really horrible feeling this morning. my head's heavy, dun tell me it's bcos of my hair. =\\ just so heavy, I'm feeling giddy. so weak, like fainting any point of time. really. hate it. like the whole sky's falling. orhh no, sky wont fall.
that's why I'm glad everything's over. though I felt soo blank a few times, but I really trying hard 2 concentrate and finish everything. yes, everything. thank god.
a few things b4 I end?;
-get well soon.
-take care, stupid thong.
-markcus should be fine by now. luckily everything's back 2 normal 4 him.
-happiness, zhiyuan.
-things will be fine, guanyi.
-happy birthday, kaimeng.
-lousy! all copycats r useless, not innovative at all! esp U!
-and shit you. you made me so dumb, making wrong decision. dun say I didnt cherish, it's you didnt care a shit thing about me. soon, I'll delete everything.
I didnt had much 2day, I dunno why I got stomachache. arghh. I loathe my nose, my stomach. they never stop giving me problems. now comes throat giving me problem.
:)I'll drawand paintyou a picture.
1:09:00 AM
Sunday, May 27, 2007
I need to talk with you again, why did you go away, All our time together, just feels like yesterday, I never thought I'd see, a single day without you, You see the things we take for granted we can sometimes lose. And if I promise not to feel this pain, Will I see you again, will I see you again.
Time will pass me by, may be I'll never learn to smile, But I know I will make it through, if you wait for me. And all the tears I cry, no matter how I try. They will never bring you home to me, so won't you wait for me in heaven.
Do you remember how it was, when we never seemed to care. Days went by so quickly, cos I thought you'd always be there. It's hard to let you go, though I know that I must try. I feel like I've been cheated, cos we never said goodbye.
And if I promise not to feel this pain, Will I see you again.
And I miss you so, and I need to know, Will you wait for me
2:07:00 AM
Saturday, May 26, 2007
Dear Angel of mine,
thought you say everything should be vice versa? but this time round, you didn't. or not the 1st time? Angel, tell me now, tell me why. tell me what, tell me when. cos I'm super devastated. Dear Angel, Angel..
I love these 2 little Star. Kiki and Lala. say hi 2 them, people. haiya, I super no mood 2 update. but really really wanna say how I feel. wasnt feeling very gd after that say of parents' meeting. but I tell no 1. everything was okay. mum's pressurizing me. but yet, somehow she's not? I dunno. "study more harder." said mum. "it's study harder!!" I corrected. but she insisted on hers rather than mine, cos she said "harder" is not enough. orhh well, regarding how she pressurize me, I wont say luhh. hmm, mrsliang touched me, by 1 simple sentence, "myself and ur teachers think that U can do well. why is it this way? U got no problems. I've seen ur files, very gd. and got no complaints from teachers. ur teachers and I believe n trust that U can do very well, if U study SMART. really. okay?" haiii. am I such a disappointing dude? and fuck! when mrho asked me how's my POA going 2day, I dunno how 2 ans back. seriously. I dun want him 2 look down on me, but I didnt do very well either. shit it. and once again, he said "HI, XIAOJUN" 2 me n give that kinda SMILE. ewwwwwwww.
c'mon, O LEVEL CHINESE. it's on monday, and I'm so going 2 do my super best, superxiaojun. dun b anxious, dun b. b strong, BE STRONG!
I think I'm dense. I shouldnt doubt any1. even though I sat down in the living room and everything just appeared in my mind. 1 sms, and wake me up. and that sms, made me doubt. but nonono, hell no I'm going 2 doubt about anything, any1, anymore. never mind, treat it as I'm hell talking shit. thanks OINKoink anyway. appreciate that.
I'm having a bloody cough, and also, say hi 2 nose bleeding. =\\\\ but it's so not going 2 bring me down. boooooooo. everytime, everything's soooo beautiful in acoustic.